Originally Posted by Sorax
No place like the internet
step by step of winning the internet
1 - never directly argue the point at hand. if someone argues water is cold, don't argue that it's warm, rather argue that it's wet. that way, your opposing argument is never wrong. if they say you are off topic, claim that you can't be off topic because you're still talking about water. if they catch on to you, and claim that you've twisted the point, ask them to show you proof. the proof is so obvious, that they really can't say it any differently than they did the first time, thus beginning a lengthy process of back and forth about nothing.
2 – now, before the other person figures out what you’re doing, hit them with an insult. for best results, use one that isn’t an outright insult. that way, you can CYA by claiming it wasn’t an insult when they call foul, yet it induces them into insulting you back. once they insult you, now you can call them a hypocrite and applaud the irony.
3 – now you have them cornered! there are only two ways out of this trap.
a. they continue attempting to dig out the hole (you so cleverly dug following steps 1 and 2), which only digs them deeper into the hole. this route is chosen by those who don’t notice the ruse that has been hatched.
b. they call you out on your ruse, and instead of playing the game, they end the cycle before it’s too late. at this point, you should now bait them to continue one last time. if they take the bait, your plan of discrediting them by making them “look more foolish” (a suggested insult from step 2) has begun. if they don’t take the bait, you can now claim to be the one who’s right, because they couldn’t out argue you, and you are now the last man standing. you shall be from thence forth known as……
Champion of the Internet!!!