Thanks for your help guys. Finally got this installed (almost) the other day.
You are of course, correct, and the knuckleheads I listened too were wrong, you cannot put the Master on 1 switch and keep a standard switch on the other. You have to have a master and a companion. As soon as I opened up the instructions I saw that there was NO getting around that.
So off to Home Depot I go. They have no companions. The knucklehead there tells me that "sure just run it with two masters, the master is smart enough to swap into companion mode". I ask "are you sure?" He replies "100%!!!!"
So I install them and of course the whole setup starts flashing like a disco ball.
I call lutron and explain whats going on and the guy tells me "No, masters don't work like that, they will fight each other and keep trying to take over the system until something pops".
So I cut the breaker again and am waiting for my companion to arrive from Amazon. Hopefully tonight.
Also: SCREW the dimmable CFLs. Who the hell wants lights that are constantly humming? Had to order 2 6 packs of 45 watt traditional bulbs, but good luck finding N30 size floods in that wattage anywhere but Amazon. Those arrived yesterday.
Buncha savages in this town....