Humor, Funny Stories, Comedy, and Jokes - AVS Forum
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post #1 of 15 Old 02-21-2014, 05:36 PM - Thread Starter
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3 guys walk into a AV store to buy plasma tvs. The first guy says.....

But wait, before I go there, I want to create a thread where we all can share our jokes, funny stores (especially if they are somewhat true), humor. I enjoy the humor in many threads. In fact I like creating and posting humor in these threads. (well I think they are humorous).

So find the humor, funny stories, comedy, and jokes, and post them here.

And smile!
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post #2 of 15 Old 02-21-2014, 05:41 PM
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post #3 of 15 Old 02-21-2014, 05:57 PM - Thread Starter
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3 guys walk into an AV store to buy plasma tvs.

The first guy tells the salesman 'I want a really good plasma tv at a relatively low price'. The salesman says 'I have just what you want. It is the number 2 in its brand That'll be $2000.' They first guy says 'Sold!' and walks out with a Panasonic VT60.

The second guy tells the salesman 'I want the brightest plsama tv you got'. The salesman says 'I have just what you want. It is so bright that it has been certified to perform cataract laser surgery. That'll be $3000.' The second guys says 'Sold!' and walks out with Samsung F8500.

The third guy tells the salesman 'I want the best plasma there is. And I bet you are going to sell me a ZT60 for $4000'. The salesman says 'Nope. The best plasma there is is a Pioneer, but they don't make them any more. But what I can do for you is take your $5000 deposit and when they come out with a 4k 12 bit 75" OLED for under $3000, you will get the very first one'. The third guy says 'Sold!' and walks out with nothing.
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post #4 of 15 Old 02-21-2014, 06:00 PM - Thread Starter
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[Posted elsewhere]

The included batteries for the VT60 are Panasonic [Japanese] batteries. And when I watch Japanese anime, like Spirited Away, the picture is beautiful. But when I then watch American animation like Oliver and Company, the picture is cartoonish.

So I changed the batteries out for Energizer [American] batteries. And when I watched American animation like The Incredibles, it has a fantastic picture. But when I then watch Japanese anime like Pokemon The Movie, the picture is boring.

Has anyone else noticed this?

I would like to watch some British animation (The Yellow Submarine) but I don't know where to find British batteries. Even if I did find them, I am worried that they would be metric.
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post #5 of 15 Old 02-21-2014, 06:08 PM - Thread Starter
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[Previously posted]

True story. A couple of years ago, when I bought and brought home my 58", I put the box in the back seat of my Camry. Barely fit, but it did. When I got home, try as I might, I could NOT get the box out of the car. I had to disassemble the box inside the car, before I could get the plasma out.
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post #6 of 15 Old 02-21-2014, 06:08 PM - Thread Starter
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[Posted elsewhere]

Panasonic has decided to leave the plasma tv business and concentrate on their Nanoe hair care business. And my wife has one of those. Have a problem with my Viera connect remote, such that if I press INPUT, CHANNEL UP, then it turns on her hair dryer. But I don't know the remote control command to use to turn it off. Do I need to download a new version of software for the Nanoe?
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post #7 of 15 Old 02-21-2014, 06:09 PM - Thread Starter
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[elsewhere]

Random thought... If they can make a 3D tv that doesn't require wearing 3D glasses, why don't they make a tv that corrects for the need to wear glasses? Then a person could watch tv without glasses. And it would be razor sharp (assuming you sit at the perfect distance for the corrective visual) . Of course only one person could watch it at one time, so they would sell more tvs. Why don't the tv manufacturers ever have these great ideas?
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post #8 of 15 Old 02-21-2014, 06:15 PM - Thread Starter
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[satire]

Stupid AMEX! They got my credit card bill all wrong this month. Why can't they understand simple transactions?

All I did during this last billing cycle was...

Ordered a 65ZT60 from an Amazon marketplace seller who has 2.2 stars, returned to Kmart a 55ST60 that I bought from Sears, cancelled a 60VT60 order from BrandsMart before I ordered it, bought 2 open box 60VT60s from Best Buy but refused delivery of one because it had a 59.8" screen (the delivery guy said it was 'shrinkage'), sold a 60ZT60 to a guy in the Costco parking who said that he was going home and sending a check to AMEX, and paid $250 to a guy from Craig's List in Nigeria who said that he was a prince in exile and that I could have his Kuro (that was in a storage locker in Miami) if I would only help him with his legal fees to get back his crown.

Is that too difficult for AMEX to keep track of, I ask you?

I figure AMEX owes me a Kuro, while they say I owe $35397.17.
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post #9 of 15 Old 02-22-2014, 04:53 PM - Thread Starter
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Doesn't anyone have any jokes or humorous stories or anything funny?
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post #10 of 15 Old 02-22-2014, 05:15 PM
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I was in BB one time last year and a saleswoman was showing an older gentleman tv's. He asks her about energy consumption of the various models and she begins touching all the screens and telling him the ones that were hotter consumed more energy. I about wanted to kick her and help the old guy myself but I chuckled and moved along.
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post #11 of 15 Old 02-22-2014, 05:26 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by XBR11 View Post

[satire]

Stupid AMEX! They got my credit card bill all wrong this month. Why can't they understand simple transactions?

All I did during this last billing cycle was...

Ordered a 65ZT60 from an Amazon marketplace seller who has 2.2 stars, returned to Kmart a 55ST60 that I bought from Sears, cancelled a 60VT60 order from BrandsMart before I ordered it, bought 2 open box 60VT60s from Best Buy but refused delivery of one because it had a 59.8" screen (the delivery guy said it was 'shrinkage'), sold a 60ZT60 to a guy in the Costco parking who said that he was going home and sending a check to AMEX, and paid $250 to a guy from Craig's List in Nigeria who said that he was a prince in exile and that I could have his Kuro (that was in a storage locker in Miami) if I would only help him with his legal fees to get back his crown.

Is that too difficult for AMEX to keep track of, I ask you?

I figure AMEX owes me a Kuro, while they say I owe $35397.17.

Good one!!!smile.gif
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post #12 of 15 Old 02-23-2014, 04:40 PM - Thread Starter
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This is not a plasma story. Just a true but funny story about monitors.

Son in the navy, is showing me his ship. We are in the control room, which has monitors all over the place showing all sorts of unusual things. Short range radar, long range radar, weather, ship's course, ocean currents, sonar, all sorts of things that I don't recognize.

I stop in front of one monitor that has this wild swirling color pattern going on. It is the most unusual thing I have seen of all the monitors. I ask my son 'What is this showing? Is it top secret?'.

Son turns me and says 'Dad, that is a Windows screen saver.'

Tour over.
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post #13 of 15 Old 02-24-2014, 10:15 AM
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About a year ago a co-worker asked me about what TV I had, as he was looking for a new one. I told him I had a couple plasmas...So he of course goes into the typical questions about burn-in, life, etc. etc.

 

But then he asked the best question I have ever heard...

 

"How do you refill the plasma?"

 

Oh, and he was a director level guy at a Fortune 500 company.

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post #14 of 15 Old 03-06-2014, 04:34 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by XBR11 View Post

Doesn't anyone have any jokes or humorous stories or anything funny?


I was thinking the same thing.

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post #15 of 15 Old 03-06-2014, 05:18 AM
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The viewing angle on an LCD is 179 degrees.
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Panasonic Tc P60vt60 60 Inch 3d Smart Plasma Hdtv , Panasonic Viera Tc P60zt60 60 Inch Plasma Tv , Samsung Pn51f8500 51 Inch 3d Smart Plasma Hdtv
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