6/6/2009Wife pushes buttons and kid barely graduates...I survived.. *exhale*
I will save you all from the numerous graduation pics, but I will tell you a little story about my experience in prepping for the graduation party and why once again I believe that my wife is absolutely crazy for "poking the bear with the stick.."
Family has been flying in from all over the country to see my kid graduate and the party is at my house... I let the kid choose whatever kind of party he wanted and you know what his only stipulation was???"I don't care, as long as we can go to an all-you-can-eat buffet.."
So I say "Done" and figure the rest is going to happen at the house so I get the theater somewhat ready to show off, I start to get my lawn in order, and I looked out in the back yard and noticed some bare spots on my cedar deck and convinced myself it would be an easy project..."Bah, just a wood deck to stain, how hard can it be?"4 #$%^&*!!@ days folks... 4 days. Why? Because I have OCD.
Day 1: I break out my pressure washer and spend all day trying to get of all the old stain. Slight muscle cramping began, but I figured I could work through it.
Day 2: Sunk all nails and replaced about 200 of them with desk screws. Bought 3 gallons of stain and was about to start slapping it on when I noticed the wood was "cupping" or was slightly warping up at the edges which would have the potential for holding water.
So I ran down to HD and rented a deck sander... 4 hours later, the deck was smooth and my back was killing me. Pressure washed it again to get all of the sanded wood off. It was then near dark when I noticed slight patches of old stain still around and I went to bed annoyed and huddled with a heat pack.
Day 3: I was first in line at the local paint shop and they set me up with a stain stripping solution and a neutralizing solution. Stuff was expensive, so I called my painter to ask to use his discount. He agreed, then told me to make sure and get the oil based stain.... crap. I told him I already bought the latex stuff I used before, and he told me it was junk and to only use the oil based.
@#$%^& money down the drain, but I did what he said. (I see later he was correct BTW)
I run back home and work ontil dark, scrubbing the stain off, neutralizing the solution, then a final pressure washing at 9:30 PM. I am sure some of the neighbors were pissed, but whatever.
Day 4: I get up early and try to beat the incoming forecasted rain storm and 6 hours later of rushing like mad, hunched over the deck, I finally get a few minutes of help from my kid, so I hobble inside to rehydrate... then the ULTIMATE test of composure occurred.
I was standing at the kitchen window chugging water and trying to wash stain off my face when out of no where, I hear my wife come... look out the window... then exhale... not exactly the sound I want to hear right now, but I bit.."What?"
She says "Nothing..."
So I ask again.. "What was the exhale for?"
Then she blurts out... "I know you are trying to save money and all... but I really wish we could get a paver patio like the neighbors have.."
(Keep in mind a nice Cedar deck costs the same as if not more than a paver patio!)
So then I instinctively increased my level of volume and possibly pitch and said.. "WHAT?!"
She tried to recover nicely by saying, "Oh don't get me wrong, what you did 'Will Do For Now', but just so you know I would rather have a paver patio sometime in the future.."
...O...M....G.... I almost blacked out with this rush of rage filling my head... I am lucky I was drinking out of a plastic cup, because I would have shattered a glass cup for sure. I am pretty sure she won the round because I had absolutely no reply other than "ARE YOU SERIOUS WITH THIS CRAP?? NOW IS NOT THE TIME... Definalty not the right time at all!"
I spent the rest of the day pissy and cramped up, but fury fueled the rest of that project
So there you go, another shining example of why I think I am married to a Peg Bundy she-devil. I guess her timing was right for her, but if she had pulled that junk on day 3, I would broken out the sawzall!