It sounds like your glasses are losing the DPL Link signal - they flash like that when they are out of Sync with the TV. How far away are you sitting and what is the room lighting like? Try to sit around 8' or closer, keep a clear line of sight between you and the TV, and make sure there are no other lights near the front of the TV making the glasses lose sync.
1. No -sounds like you got it right
2. Nope, again sounds fine.
3. I think so, yes, or your TV's dlp link signal is weak. Do you get a nice red hue shift when you go into 3D mode?
4. I like the UltraClear glasses. Others prefer the Tru Depth 3D DLP Link glasses. Lots of people like the clunky, ugly Optoma ZD 101s but I find them uncomfortable.