OMG, people are funniest people I just read some the most hilarious stuff from people who have seen it and my god these guys are brilliant. There are NO SPOILERS
, I repeat no spoilers ok I just put them it in so to condense the long bullet points. I wish I can take credit for this, enjoy...Here's my list of hysterical things
Warning: Spoiler! (Click to show)
Oh I laughed at so many things in this movie, and let me give you a list.
WOW. AND I THOUGHT THE CRITICS WERE EXAGGERATING HOW BAD THIS WAS.
Warning: Spoiler! (Click to show)
Shall we? LOL
1. That tornado scene
2. Jor-El talking to Supes in the Fortress Of Solitude and all that weird Jules Verne steampunk sh** floating about in the background. I was like...WHAT THE FU**?
3. Russell Crowe riding that Avatar/Attack Of The Clones reject creature LOL.
4. The Black Perry White.
5. The girl Jimmy Olsen
6. The bad makeup job trying to make hot Diane Lane look like an old crow to be his mom.
7. Every time Kevin Costner opened his mouth.
8. Every time Russell Crowe opened his mouth.
8. Every time Zod came on screen with that bad Caesar cut.
12. Superman flying and his face expressions. Looked like he was trying to push out a Superdump lol
13. Every piece of "dialogue" in the film
14. The video game...er uh I mean fight scenes
15. How easily Superman or whatever the hell they were calling him snapped Zod's neck after all that drama and destroying an entire city and that's all it took. LMFAO!!!
16. How they were all right back at work laughing and giggling after an entire city was just completely demolished...including their own Daily Planet Building.
17. And how Clark was now starting a job at The Daily Planet as a reporter with no prior journalistic experience. I mean everyone wants to hire a reporter who's last job was working on a crab boat. Didn't you all know that? LOL
I don't even know where to begin. I'm in shock.
Lastly, this also sums it nicely:7 superman movies in the past 35 years...only 2 are good. The one thing those 2 have in common: Directed by Richard Donner.
They literally took Superman and turned him into a generic, C average, sci-fi, Michael Bay type action film that tries to be Avatar at some points.
But forget about the highly saturated CGI sci-fi world. It's also drab and dark and dreary and devoid of any color. It's even darker and dimmer than the real world. Much more so.
I don't have the energy to go into detail. This film doesn't even deserve deep analyzation. But I'll just say what made this film the worst comic book movie of all-time. I never ever ever ever think I'd say it.... But it's even worse than Superman Returns.
What made this film so bad:
1.) We never get to know Superman or Clark Kent (or really any of the main characters: they're all just pawn pieces to move around while blowing *beep* up with CGI).
2.) The overly exaggerated Sci-fi CGI world (especially of Krypton). We feel like we're watching a bad version of Avatar in the opening, and at the end we feel like we're watching a bad version of Transformers.
3.) The Lois/Clark relationship is non-existent. Gone is the tension and revelation and excitement of Lois discovering that the nerd she works with is actually Superman and how she navigates that relationship in SUperman 1978 -- INSTEAD we get a nosy, douchie reporter who stumbles upon some dude in a spaceship and falls in love with him from then on out.
4.) ALL the characters are boring. You can't relate to them. And you kinda hate them. No character is given any weight. And we don't even follow Superman through this development as the movie jumps around like a music video.
5.) The overuse of CGI and action. It's just too much. And all of it is not that great.
6.) Lois as an action figure......lame.
7.) Nothing is a revelation. When Clark dons the suit for the first time, or when we see him for the first time in the movie -- none of it is exciting and impacting. It's flat. And no one cares (the audience was silent during these parts when they should have been cheering and clapping). The movie jumps around so much, we never get a sense of build up or reward. Again, everything just plays out like a music video.
Overall, very disappointing. I wanted to like this movie, especially after all the hate it got by critics. But this movie was terrible. Plain and simple. It felt like a 2 hour music video. It was a cheap sci-fi space movie with avatar-like CGI and action, except worse. There was no character development, no real point-of-view of the main character, and everything was just cheap and pointless: like a group of film students making their version of Superman.
P.S. Did Cavil's Superman say any more than 4 lines? Because if he did, I couldn't tell: his character was about as invisible as the walls Superman sees through.