Frankly, I've given up trying to "control" the sound bar off/on and now just leave it on, even when the TV is off. What possible harm? Power consumption is miniscule. Life is too short to fight insignificant issues (poor designs). Leave it on and move on.
We have a Samsung 65ES8000 TV and a TIVO Premier with 2 remotes. We control everything
with the TIVO remote.
The TIVO HDMI out connects to the soundbar and from there to the #2 HDMI (ARC) input on the TV. That's it.
Optical cable is not used. (optical is actually used with TV & all other devices to connect to the legacy (YAMAHA) receiver & "big" surround system, which we seldom use.
Our sole reason for getting the HWE450 was to augment the weak, cigar box speakers built into the TV while at the same time not having to run the big surround system except in those few occasions where we want to watch a movie. In all other instances the HWE 450 is actually better in that it doesn't suddenly shake the whole damn house. (Full surround is nice, but many times a full surround system is overkill....plus fumbling with remotes again)
We prefer using a single, intuitive remote. (TIVO)
We do happen to have a Harmony 880 but don't use it as it's not intuitive (too many buttons in too tight of a cluster - confusing to use plus there's only one of them and its use requires finding & putting on our glasses.
We have two identical remotes for the TIVO. Simple, intuitive. That way when one of us falls asleep in the chair or on the couch it's really nice not having to disturb them for the dang remote.
Wait until you get our age (66) before criticizing