Setting/Adjustment Questions

I'm pretty new to starting my gear collection, and I am saving up for the rest later.. I currently have a 2.0 which consists of a Marantz SR5007 and a pair of B&W CM5s.

My questions are this:

1.) At what decibel do you consider a somewhat loud decibel on your avr/pre? Granted in my situation the setup is in my rather small room, roughly 10x15, and it's less than ideal. On my Marantz I generally listen to movies/music/gaming anywhere from -45.0dB to -35.0dB. I was just wondering what everyone else generally set their dB at for general listening. I've always been nervous to let loose, for fear of messing up my speakers haha.

2.) I've ran my Audyssey, and I'm just curious what EQ setting to set it to. Virtual usually sounds to the loudest and fullest. Or i can do: Stereo / Auto / Multi Channel In. What's correct?

Any help is appreciated.
Edited by Torcha - 2/3/13 at 1:36pm

Should I use Stereo for everything? Movies, music, & gaming? And again, I'm always nervous about messing up my speakers, but what dB is considered moderately loud? Once I put it back to stereo I had to go to about -35.0dB to be loud enough for the time being.

Another question.. Should I turn Dynamic EQ ON of OFF? I've tried it both ways, and with it off is just sounds really flat. I mostly just connect my laptop via RCA -> headphone jack. I just feel like my sound is lacking a lot. Since I have started using Stereo I still usually listen to music at about -35dB to -30dB. Maybe I just need to turn it up louder? I'm just nervous to crank it and mess something up in the receiver or speakers themselves.

Any suggestions?

Edit: Will a cheap ~$30 SPL meter from amazon work fine?