Have to agree...DON'T waste your time on this POS.
What a disappointment.
Usually NC picks reasonably good films, but Bangkok Dangerous Stupidness is lame and just plain ridiculous.
Synopsis:
We have a super-duper hitman on his last job.
During the setup, the narrative (by our hero) spews out all the "rules" for being a successful killer (in a very flat, dark monotone).
That is: how NOT to get caught or become a casualty in his occupation.
Don't get involved with people, keep a low profile, keep moving, don't let anyone know who you are, etc.
OK...got it, standard stuff.
And then...
AND THEN, proceeds to break
every single one of his rules, while acting like he has ****e for brains during the entire time.
He falls in love (after 30 seconds of first seeing her) with an innocent little Thai pharmacy clerk that is....drumroll please: DEAF.
Yup, that's right...DEAF and doesn't understand a word of english (no, he can't speak a lick of Thai either).
That's right, class: she can't read his lips and has no idea what he is trying to communicate to her.
As you might guess, this is a match made in heaven.
Seriously folks, did ANYONE involved in the production of this film take 5 seconds to consider how stupid this might appear to an audience?????
Being a super-duper hitman that has been too smart/sly to have ever been caught, our hero decides to make one of his last hits in broad daylight in a canoe on a canal in Bangkok that has more traffic than Interstate 5 during rush hour.
I ****e you not.
His plan is to sit in the front of a dugout with a handful of greens covering his pistol and shoot the baddie coming the opposite way in another canoe at a distance of a dozen feet...in broad daylight with dozens of people around, staring at our European hitman.
I lasted an hour...far longer than I should have (perhaps masochism will always be my cross to bear).
Whatever you do, DON'T make the same mistake I did.
Grab Plan 9 and throw it in your player...you'll thank me later.
